Part One – Addressing jealousy, falsely being happy when others are doing well/ taking up space or even achieving their goals & confronting comparison

Ok so this topic is a whole thing. I was on my way to work and the Holy Spirit convicted me and started revealing things to me firstly about myself, and then about our generation generally. What He said is – the enemy uses comparison to try and make you diminish the value of your own gift – And of course the value of your own gift, your life and the circumstance you are in now does not go down because someone else is experiencing a win or seemingly doing well. That’s the deception. 

What is triggered in us is a fear-based response – False Evidence Appearing Real. We think like this… how annoying that Susan got the job/gig/collab/husband, she has X/Y/Z and I don’t, I should be there, maybe this means that my gifts, talents or in fact my value as a person is invalidated by her win. Or, I am less than. I needa hurry up before Susan overtakes me more. 

The truth, Susan’s win is not evidence that you are behind, inadequate or not deserving, or that what is happening for Susan won’t happen for you. What we are experiencing as a generation, is a heart issue of lovelessness and selfishness. And instead of abiding by God’s principles of unity, rejoicing with those who rejoice and considering others above oneself, we are faced with the bitter opposite… division, hating on others’ success and focusing solely on me, myself and I.

This blog will be set out in a few parts because there is some ground to cover here and we gon go through it step by step as God is currently giving it to me. By the time you have finished reading this series of blogs, my goal is that you are set free from fomo, jealousy, anxiety and the stress of running a race that does not belong to you, at a pace that is unsustainable. 

So, before we talk about how to remedy comparison, jealousy and not being happy for others… I wanted to contextualise this conversation and consider some reasons why people are doing well/experiencing public wins. 

1. They’re not – an obvious one, but people online lie for clout and/or over exaggerate a situation. People make things look glamorous when in fact there is chaos so then in fact what you are envious of is a false reality. 

2. To the extent that the W’s are real, there are biblical principles that the Lord of Heaven has to honour that apply to everyone, believers and non-believers alike. God is not a man that He should lie (Numbers 23:19). So I’d like to highlight just a few of those principles:
   • give and you will be given back more, the measure in which you give it’ll be given back (Luke 6:38). Note: this works both ways – if you sow discord, guess what you are going to reap all the more.
   • “A generous person will prosper” (Proverbs 11:25).
   • You will sow what you reap (Galatians 6:7-9).
   • the gifts and calling of God are without repentance (Romans 11:29). This means, you do not need to be a christian to have and operate in your God-given gift and calling. If God has given someone naturally an amazing voice or an entrepreneurial mind, that’s just how they are built. But competition shouldn’t be a thing in the kingdom because…
   • If a person decides to utilise their God given gift, it makes room for them and causes them to be seen by/work with, great people (Proverbs 18:16). The good news is this applies to you to.
   • “He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous” (Matthew 5:45). Good things will happen to bad people, it is not formulaic and sometimes it just won’t make sense.
   • As a man thinketh, so he is (Proverbs 23:7). Ya’ll ever met someone who made it just cos they had the unwaivering belief that they are a good singer, actor, (insert occupation). The world calls this manifesting, but it only works because it is a principle of Heaven.
   • The Spirit of God is everywhere and if a person elects to ask for help/ seek God they will find him (sooo many scriptures to highlight  this but start with (Psalms 139:7-10, Matthew 7:7-8, Revelation 3:20).

3. The above are only a small handful of the principles of Heaven that God honours and apply to all. But there are certain promises reserved for believers because it requires the believer to do something eg to pray and have a prayer life, have faith, cast your burdens, forgive etc. In other words, the proactivity of the believer causes God’s hand to act. This is important because a new level of favour is unlocked when you walk with God – the promises of God are yes and amen after all (2 Corinthians 1:20). There are sooo many promises of God as it relates to the believer, I couldn’t possibly mention them all, literally hundreds. Think of anytime in the bible where God says ‘I will…’. But here are some to remember (specifically related to having a prayer life), when you see others winning. And side note, you might want to take these for yourself:

• Yes, ask me for anything in my name, and I will do it! (John 14:14). This is Jesus talking.
• Those who live in the shelter of the Most High will find rest in the shadow of the Almighty (Psalm 91:1). Just the presence of God changes things and if a believer does their day to day in the shadow of God… suttin different when you get around those people.
• “But when you pray, go away by yourself, shut the door behind you, and pray to your Father in private. Then your Father, who sees everything, will reward you.” (Matthew 6:6).
• Don’t worry about anything, instead pray about everything and the peace of God will guard your heart and mind (Phillipians 4:6)
• “For the eyes of the LORD range throughout the earth to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him.” (2 Chronicles 16:9)

To conclude this first blog, though I have spent some time on why someone might be experiencing a win, the truth of the matter is we will never know. What’s better is it is not mine or your business. I think I highlighted these things to be somewhat of a comfort, because if you can understand these biblical principles of the happenings of life, you’ll know that (going back to my first point) there is nothing about you or your gift that is wrong. Therefore, you don’t even need to entertain the false evidence. You can carry on running your race at your pace, confident that what you bring to this world is different to Susan and the same God that made room for Susan, will make room for you and your gift, in His time.

See ya next week for the next one!

I love reading your comments so drop one below if you enjoyed this. Follow me on the gram @dominique.octave & DM me or email me at hellodominiqueoctave@gmail.com.

xx